Janelle In Real Life

Janelle In Real Life

7.22.2016

Autism



Today we spent several hours with a child psychologist & child development expert while they evaluated our sweet Carson. I sat and listened quietly as she told us that our son is Autistic.

I heard every word she said and made mental notes of all the advice & resources she offered us. I wrote down websites, books, and organizations to contact. I listened as she told us we would need extra speech & behavioral therapy in addition to the special education preschool services Carson was getting though our school district. I added up the costs for each of these treatments and listened as she told us we would need to FIGHT for insurance coverage.

My husband asked me how I felt about all of it after our meetings & evaluations were over and I just shrugged... which was honestly a perfect description of how I felt. Indifferent, numb...

We've been through things like this before. He was evaluated at 18 months old and again at 2 1/2 by early intervention programs because of his delayed speech. I fought hard to get him a meeting and IEP with our school district when he turned 3 so he wouldn't fall through the cracks during our move. And of course we've dealt with the day to day of an undiagnosed autistic child.

 This is different though in a good way and a bad. A diagnosis will be so helpful in getting him the resources he needs. And it helps me feel like I'm not such a miserable parent. There are reasons that our communication sucks and reasons for why he loses his marbles in public every.single.time and it's not that I'm a horrible mom. But a diagnosis is also admitting that things will be different for him (and me) as he grows up. And I hate that.

I love my son and nothing will change that, but now I have to mourn the loss of what I thought my parenting experience would be like. Carson and I (and my husband of course) work SO HARD to help him learn things that come completely naturally to others kids. And this is my life now. Advocating, fighting for him to have all the opportunity he needs to succeed. And learning everything I can do to help. The psychologist told us that we would become experts and our knowledge would eventually surpass the actual experts that would be helping him.

Today I came home and I lost it. I cried and cried and threw a tantrum because why me? Why Carson? He is my perfect angel baby! He's the sweetest little boy... so kind and so loving. So why does he have to grow up struggling with things that come so easily to others? It's not fair.

I felt indifferent before, and now I feel all the emotions. I'm a mess. And I'm sorting it all out, and maybe I'm oversharing but I'm writing this because it helps.

6.08.2016

Easy 5 minute makeup


 Today I wanted to share my easy go-to makeup routine! During the (almost) summer I like to keep it simple with my makeup... and of course with kids running around sometimes all I have is 5 minutes! It's super quick and makes SUCH a difference for me. Here are the products I use:

Clinique CC cream-- I've tried a few different CC and BB creams and this one is by far and away my favorite. The color and texture are great, and it gives coverage without being heavy at all! Another plus is that I don't have to layer moisturizer, sunscreen, and foundation... this has it all! Find it here.

Kat Von D lock-it concealer-- this concealer has AMAZING coverage! Love it, that's all I have to say. Find it here.

Benefit hoola bronzer-- this is a newer product for me, but I've been wearing it non stop! The color is not too warm & is perfect for a light, natural contour. Find it here!

NARS blush-- The shade "orgasm" is a perfect peachy color. It has a pretty gold shimmer to it and give you the best glow. I cannot rave enough about it! I know it's on the expensive side for blush but it seriously one of my favorite makeup purchases! And a little goes a long way. Find it here!

Benefit roller lash mascara-- This is a newer mascara for me (I went off lash extensions after having them for a while) and I really really love it! Makes your lashes look long & thick without being clumpy. Another one of my favorites is l'oreal telescopic mascara if you're looking for a cheaper option! Find the benefit mascara here.

Buxom lip gloss-- I have the shade "Amber" which is a pretty peachy-pink. Really, any lipgloss in this shade family works great... I also love Maybelline Baby Lips in "peach kiss." Find the Buxom gloss here.

I'm always changing up my makeup products, but these are some of my go-to's right now for a quick, easy look. Hope this was helpful to those who have been asking for a makeup routine!

5.23.2016

jump around!

Jumpsuits. When they started popping up on fashion blogs I thought noooo way. I do NOT want to wear what look like my toddlers footie pajamas as an adult.
Obviously my thoughts on jumpsuits have changed, mostly because I've seen them styled soooo much better lately!

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jumpsuit- c/o Tobi // sandals- old navy // bag- thrifted, find it here // sunglasses- nordstrom rack

This jumpsuit from Tobi hits it out of the park... so comfy and easy to dress up or down! You'll probably find me wearing this allllll the time.

So if you're following me on instagram, you've seen that I cut my hair since I took these photos! It's waaaay shorter and sort of fun but I'm also a little bit missing my long hair. I'm trying to remind myself that it's just hair though, and it honestly looks fine long or short!

Hope you all have a fab week!
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